While On Life's Journey.....

One of my “long-term” clients recently rang me; he had relapsed over the holidays. He reviewed the events leading up to his decision to use, he described the “week from hell” that he experienced as a result of his “poor choice”, and he cried as to “why” he keeps “doing this”. He talked about how his “heart is hurting” from the pain he has caused for the people that love and support him; for the pain he has, once again, caused himself. He, his family, his significant other, and his friends are all “very disappointed” and wonder “Is he back at it again?” The interesting piece of information here is that he didn’t really relapse over the holiday—he used over the holiday—the relapse, however, started months ago. Seldom does a recovering person get up in the morning and think, “Today I will relapse.” Reality is they work up to the relapse, and, if they, or you, know what to look for--well, maybe... In various hand-outs given in treatment programs, it is suggested that there are approximately eleven phases leading to relapse:
(1) Internal Warning Signs: difficulty thinking clearly, managing feelings and emotions, managing stress, sleeping restfully;
(2) Return of Denial: feeling uneasy, afraid, anxious, but denying these feelings;
(3) Avoidance and Defensive Behavior: worrying about others more than self, defensiveness, compulsive/impulsive behaviors, feelings of loneliness;
(4) Building Crises: tunnel vision, minor depression, loss of constructive realistic planning;
(5) Immobilization: daydreaming/wishful thinking, sense of failure, immature wish to be happy;
(6) Confusion and Overreaction: irritation with friends, easily angered, periods of confusion;
(7) Depression: poor eating and sleeping habits, lack of motivation, loss of daily structure, periods of deep depression;
(8) Behavioral Loss of Control: “I don’t care” attitude, rejects help, not satisfied with life, feelings of powerlessness and helplessness;
(9) Recognition of Loss of Control: self-pity, thoughts of social drinking, complete loss of self-confidence;
(10) Option Reduction: thoughts of insanity, suicide, addictive use, unreasonable resentment, total disconnect from any treatment, overwhelming loneliness, frustration, anger, tension;
(11) Return to Addictive Use: return to “controlled” addictive use, shame, guild, loss of control, life and health problems.
Please be warned: knowing this information doesn’t necessary STOP the relapse. The addict must have a genuine commitment to living a clean, sober, healthier lifestyle. AND, relapse may happen as part of the recovery process. Knowing, and, using this information may assist in short circuiting the relapse process. Now that you have the information, how will you use it?

MAx Fabry: Learn more about me and my private practice at
www.lifestylechangescounseling.com

I am also founder and proud member of Online Wellness Association
www.onlinewellnessassociation.com